What is Happiness for You?
Different people define Happiness in different ways. A dictionary definition of happiness is “a state of well-being, a pleasurable or satisfying experience.” Most people go on their Pursuit of Happiness by seeking out the pleasurable or satisfying experiences by buying things, doing things, eating things, achieving things, getting awards and rewarded, getting the good job, the house with the white picket fence, the 2.5 kids, etc., in essence, some of the American Dream.
Most of us spend our time and money pursuing these things which gives us “happiness” for a while, only to find that, to continue this feeling of happiness, we have to keep engaging in these behaviors in order to keep feeding our happiness.
This makes us think, at least temporarily that we are happy, and, it is true, to
be happy at the cognitive level is to feel happy with your life, the progress
you are making on life goals or the direction in which your life is going.
Being truly happy is not about owning things or doing things or being with a certain person or having a certain job, etc., although all of them can help us feel good in the short run. The person who is truly happy is the one that can find happiness within themselves first. Only then can they easily find happiness in just about anything. This is where true happiness is found.
When people become unhappy, most likely they’re basing their happiness on something outside of themselves. This is called having more of an external locus of control, where one’s happiness depends on external events.
If you want to be truly happy you must start by being happy with who you are. To be happy on an emotional level means experiencing fairly frequent positive emotions and relatively infrequent negative emotions. So, if you have frequent negative emotions, they are being caused by your negative thoughts and beliefs, which all result in dysfunctional behaviors such as anxiety, worry, fear, depression, anger, guilt, shame and even physical pain.
So, to be more happy with who you are, you have to RELEASE the negative thoughts and beliefs that making you unhappy and cause your negative emotions and dysfunctional behaviors.
I can help you do that with the more progressive, much more effective therapeutic methods that I have been using on myself and my clients for years, the Quickest, Easiest and most Effective being Brainspotting.
Some Factors Associated with Happiness
(What areas are you Happy or Content in and which areas would you want to improve in?)
Positive Mindset overall
Optimism and Gratitude
a sense of hope and excitement about your life
feeling like you like yourself
Financial: managing your economic life to reduce stress and increase security
Job satisfaction/Money? Do You Love Your Career/Job?
Family of Origin as well as extended family
Love Relationship - Your Romantic Life
Social Relationships: having supportive relationships and love in your life
People who have one or more close friendships are happier.
With Peers at work
With your Boss(es)
liking where you live, feeling safe, and having pride in your community
Purpose: liking what you do each day and being motivated to achieve your goals
Do you have a purpose in life?
Do you have a greater meaning in your life?
Any spiritual leanings that help you through tougher times?
Physical: having good health and enough energy to get things done daily
Regular exercise is associated with improved mental well-being
Eat well enough
Peace with Your Past:
For many people, regret is a lifelong cause of unhappiness. People who aren’t at peace with their past can never be completely happy in the present. Since the past cannot be changed, the only way to keep your past from ruining your present is to make peace with it.
And, last, but certainly not least,
How do you Relieve/Release Your Stress?
So, to be more happy with who you are,
you have to RELEASE
the negative thoughts, beliefs, and feelings
that are making you unhappy.
I WILL HELP YOU DO JUST THAT!
with Brainspotting and the other more progressive,
that I have been using on myself and my clients for years,
the Quickest, Easiest and most Effective being Brainspotting!
I CAN HELP YOU
TRANSFORM YOUR LIFE!